Some relationz in life are special….extremely special….some relationz in life are just meant to be….some relationz in life are just uncommendably beautiful….my relation with her is also somewhat similar….shez not my
girl-friend….nor she is just a best friend….shez more than best friend n less than my girl-friend….!!
We know eachother from the past 7 yearz….I still remember the first time we met….I didn’t liked her much at that time n couldn’t think even in my wildest dreamz that she could ever be so damn special for me….but who knew what waz in take for me next….now she is my closest buddy….my life….people think we are in love…..well yes…!!! We are in love….but it isn’t necessary that if a guy n a girl love eachother they have to go in a relationship on the spot….where is it written….?? Sometimez my friendz ask that why u both don’t into a relationship officially….?? They say that we hangout together….we are alwayz with eachother….we can’t survive without eachother….basically we love eachother….the world knowz….then why can’t we go in an official relationship….?? Whatz the big deal…??
Well it is actually a very big deal…atleast for me it is…I just smiled n said that I am a “one man girl”….I can’t just step into a relationship like that…if I will go into a relation it will be forever….so I need time to realize if she is actually my miss. right….?? Is she the one for whom I can do anything…?? Is she my unconditional love…?? And the same goez for her as well….even she needz to realize if i am her shona with whom she can spend her entire life….we both are waiting to realize if we both are actually in love….if we both are actually prepared to be in a relationship….If we both are mentally prepared to face the complicationz….the upz n downz together…so till then we won’t go in a relation….!!!
We have got atleast 60 yearz of our life more to live with our life partner ofcourse….so atleast a few yearz time is justified enough to judge our life partner…right….?? How can someone spend his whole remaining life with someone u don’t even know properly…choosing our life partner is definitely one of the most crucial decision n one must take it properly….there is no scope of a wrong decision or regret in future….we don’t want to blame eachother in future for our wrong decision….thatz why we both aren’t in a relationship…we both are simply waiting to see if we are compatible enough….if we are made for eachother….if we both are actually eachotherz soulmatez…..the day we both find the answer to be “YES”….we will declare our relationship officially….so till than hez my“MORE THAN FRIEND N LESS THAN LOVER” n I am proud of it…..!!! ♥
I met Her several times before i really "met " her..
Something about her,even un tied hairs just spoke to me.
We fight ..sometimes she makes me angry and at other times I make Her mad
BUT
at the end of the day..We would ALWAYS come home to eachother..no matter how big or small the fight is..
We have had our own share of difficulties ,misunderstandings , insecurities and all ..
We don't always do the best job of communicating with each other but trust me i can't imagine my life with anyone else..
I never thought that She would become "home" for me..but she did..
All i need after a long tiring day is her telling me that its okay..that it'll all be better tomorrow :)..-believe me..she does make me feel like tomorrow would be a better day..and that it would be easier..
We don't have a huge house..or we don't get to see each other as often as we like.but we have each other...and that s enough for now..
just knowing that she is near..is enough..
2 years and 11 months--Time really does fly ..and in all this time,not once have i regretted anything..
all this time..my love for her has only grown ♥..
I am waiting for the day when i wouldn't have to wait to see her,the day when i would be with her..celebrating everyday of togetherness :)
______________________________
Love doesn't mean seeing eachother everyday.
Love means being with eachother when he/ she needs you.
Love isn't about gifts, chocolates or your bank balance.
Love can be as simple as just holding hands and sitting in some park enjoying the silence.
Love doesn't always have to be about kisses ..
Love can be you and him talking like two best friends, pouring your hearts out.
Love doesnt have to be the way it is glorified in books and movies. Love is far from all of it.
Its about spending your life with the person who means the most to you..
" I could take back those moments that snatched you away from me or maybe just wipe away those when you came to me for the first time and I looked into your eyes to realise what love is. "
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Something about her,even un tied hairs just spoke to me.
We fight ..sometimes she makes me angry and at other times I make Her mad
BUT
at the end of the day..We would ALWAYS come home to eachother..no matter how big or small the fight is..
We have had our own share of difficulties ,misunderstandings , insecurities and all ..
We don't always do the best job of communicating with each other but trust me i can't imagine my life with anyone else..
I never thought that She would become "home" for me..but she did..
All i need after a long tiring day is her telling me that its okay..that it'll all be better tomorrow :)..-believe me..she does make me feel like tomorrow would be a better day..and that it would be easier..
We don't have a huge house..or we don't get to see each other as often as we like.but we have each other...and that s enough for now..
just knowing that she is near..is enough..
2 years and 11 months--Time really does fly ..and in all this time,not once have i regretted anything..
all this time..my love for her has only grown ♥..
I am waiting for the day when i wouldn't have to wait to see her,the day when i would be with her..celebrating everyday of togetherness :)
______________________________
Love doesn't mean seeing eachother everyday.
Love means being with eachother when he/ she needs you.
Love isn't about gifts, chocolates or your bank balance.
Love can be as simple as just holding hands and sitting in some park enjoying the silence.
Love doesn't always have to be about kisses ..
Love can be you and him talking like two best friends, pouring your hearts out.
Love doesnt have to be the way it is glorified in books and movies. Love is far from all of it.
Its about spending your life with the person who means the most to you..
" I could take back those moments that snatched you away from me or maybe just wipe away those when you came to me for the first time and I looked into your eyes to realise what love is. "
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Its going to be exactly 2years since we entered into a long distance because I had to leave.
How did we manage,people ask.
Jealousy.
insecurity.
Possessiveness.
Fights.
Tears.
-Yes, we have been through all of it.
Jealousy when she would not have time for me but I would find her talking to others.
Insecurity when I would talk to her about my new friends (particularly girls).
Possessiveness when I would notice her talking to some other guy whom I didn't know.
Fights because both of us would be frustrated because of the distance.
Tears coz the fights would have the better of us and would leave us broken..
Tears of missing!
_____________________________
Initially we couldn't really cope with the distance because we were the kind who would meet everyday! The days seemed incomplete without her and I found it difficult to accept that I just couldn't see her.not even for a second.
That I couldn't feel her.
But let me tell you, you get used to it,once you accept it.
I stayed , when She told me to leave.
She gave me the strength when I thought I couldn't take the distance anymore.
We were there for eachother.
We had a choice.
A choice- to either take the easy way out and part ways or to be together and face things as they come.
We chose the second option coz we loved eachother too much to leave.
We could do it! We would do it!....for eachother!
Who said it was going to be easy?
They just said that the ride was gonna be worthwhile.
Today , A major part of who I am is because of her. She is been there with me when the world left.
She has held my hand each time I thought I couldn't go on.
She made me believe in myself again when I gave up.
She didn't leave when most people would have.
Then, How could we give up?..:)
Who said that you have to see eachother everyday to be in love?
We are two people perfect for eachother who just fell in love at the wrong time.
And so I ll wait for "our time". Coz even this distance can't take her away from me.
She's all I have!
It’s been two year. I mean, I guess it has. I can’t pinpoint when I fell in love with you. It wasn’t when we first started talking last 2 last summer. It wasn’t by the end of last year, I was already in a different relationship. But it happened sometime. I started to love you. I still love you. I don’t know why.
We’ve never met. I started talking to you randomly after a mass-chat ended. It was just us and we talked until like four in the morning. The next day? Same thing. It became a common occurrence. We’d talk all night, when our other friends would ask us why we weren’t on Skype with the group of people, they would know. They just stopped asking after a while.
Whenever it was we finally decided to fess up to the slow, building feelings we had both been having, it was liberating. But entrapping at the same time. Pretty soon after we ended up “together.” Even though we never wanted to call it that. 800 miles between us was enough for us to not want to be “dating.” Neither of us would want to do the long distance thing.
I went to school a month before you did. Before I left I tried to make things easier. Stop talking as much. Stop being on Skype all the time with you. But it just… Well, it worked a bit. But it saw fit to rip how I felt to shreds. I just wanted to keep on being with you, fuck talking to other people, fuck college. I just wanted to spend all the time I could talking with you.
Being at college has been a haze of things. Orientation and classes, hanging out with the new people I’ve met until late hours, smoking at night with a few people, then going to bed and restarting it all the next day. I’ve been busy and we haven’t talked a lot. Sure. I’ve called. We’ve talked some. And every time I feel the same, I don’t want to stop. I don’t care if it’s silence. You’re still there. And then I’ll finally hang up to go back to my life here.
When I hang out with people I feel like I could be happy with them. I am while I am with them. And then in the darkness before I end up falling asleep there’s some sort of guilt. Why am I bothering spending time thinking about them, when I should be thinking about you? You’re the one I love. I can’t hide those feelings. But you’re too damn far away, and you’ve not been the best one in this whole “managing some form of relationship that is long distance thing.”
You called me a week after I had been at college and said “We need to talk.” And we just talked about inconsequential things. I had homework to get to. But when I said I needed to go, you blurted out “Are we like… actually dating?” There. The point of you calling me. The way you said it let me know, you had something to tell me. But it wasn’t something I wanted to hear. It wasn’t something you wanted to tell. I answered no. You didn’t have to tell me anything.
You asked me what would happen if we found other people we had feelings for. I said if it happened to you, you just needed to tell me and I’d let you go. As if it would be that easy. I said it because if it had happened to me I’d want you to be able to be okay with it, I guess. Then you asked about hooking up with someone. That was harder. I told you it’d be okay. Because if I had hooked up with someone because we “weren’t dating” and the fact that you were 800 odd miles away, I’d still want you to love me. I value you too much.
I asked you who you had hooked up with.
You told me it was some guy at camp you hadn’t seen in years. And you didn’t even know how it happened. And you asked me if we were still okay. If I hated you.
Of course I didn’t. I had told you we weren’t dating. I had told you I’d be okay with it. But I don’t even know. As soon as you had fessed up… It fucked me up. I started spending more time with people here and not talking to you. When we talked earlier it felt good. But you talked about a party you had just gotten back from.
You told me that there were others you could go to, but you weren’t ‘cause your roommate wanted you to walk her back. So you had agreed. My fear of you hooking up with someone. Of finding someone. Of anything like that hit me like a brick. You’ve got me wrapped around your little finger. You could do anything you wanted with a guy, tell me, and I’d be a bit pissed. But I’d be held back by my love for you.
I can’t even think about these people down here that I could be with. That would be better for my to be with. I can’t think about it because it makes me think of you and how much I would hate myself for finding someone else and hurting you. I hate being the emo kid of the century, but I don’t have anything to hide from this with. I don’t have a bottle to hole up in, I don’t have anything to make me forget for a night.
So I wanted to do something to organize my thoughts. I picked this. Writing.
With love
We’ve never met. I started talking to you randomly after a mass-chat ended. It was just us and we talked until like four in the morning. The next day? Same thing. It became a common occurrence. We’d talk all night, when our other friends would ask us why we weren’t on Skype with the group of people, they would know. They just stopped asking after a while.
Whenever it was we finally decided to fess up to the slow, building feelings we had both been having, it was liberating. But entrapping at the same time. Pretty soon after we ended up “together.” Even though we never wanted to call it that. 800 miles between us was enough for us to not want to be “dating.” Neither of us would want to do the long distance thing.
I went to school a month before you did. Before I left I tried to make things easier. Stop talking as much. Stop being on Skype all the time with you. But it just… Well, it worked a bit. But it saw fit to rip how I felt to shreds. I just wanted to keep on being with you, fuck talking to other people, fuck college. I just wanted to spend all the time I could talking with you.
Being at college has been a haze of things. Orientation and classes, hanging out with the new people I’ve met until late hours, smoking at night with a few people, then going to bed and restarting it all the next day. I’ve been busy and we haven’t talked a lot. Sure. I’ve called. We’ve talked some. And every time I feel the same, I don’t want to stop. I don’t care if it’s silence. You’re still there. And then I’ll finally hang up to go back to my life here.
When I hang out with people I feel like I could be happy with them. I am while I am with them. And then in the darkness before I end up falling asleep there’s some sort of guilt. Why am I bothering spending time thinking about them, when I should be thinking about you? You’re the one I love. I can’t hide those feelings. But you’re too damn far away, and you’ve not been the best one in this whole “managing some form of relationship that is long distance thing.”
You called me a week after I had been at college and said “We need to talk.” And we just talked about inconsequential things. I had homework to get to. But when I said I needed to go, you blurted out “Are we like… actually dating?” There. The point of you calling me. The way you said it let me know, you had something to tell me. But it wasn’t something I wanted to hear. It wasn’t something you wanted to tell. I answered no. You didn’t have to tell me anything.
You asked me what would happen if we found other people we had feelings for. I said if it happened to you, you just needed to tell me and I’d let you go. As if it would be that easy. I said it because if it had happened to me I’d want you to be able to be okay with it, I guess. Then you asked about hooking up with someone. That was harder. I told you it’d be okay. Because if I had hooked up with someone because we “weren’t dating” and the fact that you were 800 odd miles away, I’d still want you to love me. I value you too much.
I asked you who you had hooked up with.
You told me it was some guy at camp you hadn’t seen in years. And you didn’t even know how it happened. And you asked me if we were still okay. If I hated you.
Of course I didn’t. I had told you we weren’t dating. I had told you I’d be okay with it. But I don’t even know. As soon as you had fessed up… It fucked me up. I started spending more time with people here and not talking to you. When we talked earlier it felt good. But you talked about a party you had just gotten back from.
You told me that there were others you could go to, but you weren’t ‘cause your roommate wanted you to walk her back. So you had agreed. My fear of you hooking up with someone. Of finding someone. Of anything like that hit me like a brick. You’ve got me wrapped around your little finger. You could do anything you wanted with a guy, tell me, and I’d be a bit pissed. But I’d be held back by my love for you.
I can’t even think about these people down here that I could be with. That would be better for my to be with. I can’t think about it because it makes me think of you and how much I would hate myself for finding someone else and hurting you. I hate being the emo kid of the century, but I don’t have anything to hide from this with. I don’t have a bottle to hole up in, I don’t have anything to make me forget for a night.
So I wanted to do something to organize my thoughts. I picked this. Writing.
With love
